omg.
sighs.

seriously, can monday just come faster???
well, not that i'm so well prepared for FM la.
its just that...

i just want LIBERATION!

somehow or rather, this is dragging for far too long.
perhaps the idea of a 3-mth break is far too tempting.
sighs.

On the very long and boring train ride home after my exam today, I decided to pop by the library before heading home. I realised that i haven gone there ever since sem2 started. Which means that my only form of reading had been my studying materials, of which i had only read my biz law txtbk with fascinating interest at the beginning of the year. But somehow, as the sem drags on, the new found interest just became staler. The flame started to diminish and with the repetitive readings of the law concepts, everything just gets blurred alr, esp. when i was having the last preparations for my biz law paper today.

But i digress.

Well, the decision to pop by the library and pick up a few good books was spurred by the realisation of how spiritually and ideologically empty i've been. In its idle state, my mind is just totally blank. And this thought is kinda scary, so i decided to nourish it with some interesting reads. Realised that i've gotten past the the stage of chick lit, (although i may perhaps pick 1 or 2 up in future, just for light reading) and i was just looking for books that can serve as inspiration or contain lines that are so endearing such that one just reads it over and over a couple of times in order to sift out its true meaning or impact.

Well, the thing is, my exams have not ended yet. haha. I still have my FM (financial management) paper nxt mon, and i have not revised at all for it yet. So i still have to face numbers and concepts before indulging in the bookworm world completely. But anyway, just let me know of any good book recommendations if u have any!

Hmmm just some more updates abt grades. Ah yes, in the world of a student, grades seem to be the central of our lives and sometimes the pursuit of As seem to be of such paramount importance that B+ doesnt seem any more different to a C- anymore. Or rather, in uni, it appears as if only A+ deserve a "wow", while an A has joined the peasant status. Tsk tsk.

Oh dear, i digressed again.

Well, the IT proj which i've been complaining abt (cant even keep track of the no. of times when i lament to roomie and neighbours why acc students have to take IT) and got so vexed over a whole month previously, finally earned me a grade that paid off my efforts. The fact that it was an individual project forced me to explore new areas and discover that there're actually hardly any limits in life, as long as we're willing to ask, find out and learn. But of cos, many times, sloth induced procrastination to take over in human nature. And upon completing the project, I feel quite proud of myself that i actually came up with sth and not just give up completely. Anyway, I appreciate the aid given by some frens in some way or other. Regardless if the aid was really of useful help or not in the end, at least they offered and tried. Thanks!

The process of completing projects in this sem had been difficult. A huge contrast to the fun times i had during proj meetings last sem. In fact, the modules in this sem just didnt appeal to me that much. Except bizlaw and elective, i guess. Well overall, its been a very difficult sem. I'm glad its almost over, being left with just 1 more paper. Hmmm but of cos, as we always look back, every difficult journey is where the most number of learning opportunities lie.

Oh and sth random here. my senior created these 2 pics for me!

daphne going shopping.

daphne mugging.

haha so cute right! =)

sighs.
very bored right now.
well actually, i'm not supposed to be.
considering i still have 3 papers left.
and its not as if the papers are going to be a breeze for me.
ah wells.

have kinda lost my motivation somehow.
the past 2 papers were so....... crap.
esp. IT!
omg.
and my mum finds it weird that i can still smile when i reached home after my IT paper.
which induced her to think that i did ok for my paper, which i doubt is the case actually.
ha.
wads wrong with me.
i think i've become so numb for this module such that i've kinda psychoed myself that whatever will be will be.

and i cant balance my cashflow for acc.
which is sth that i'm quite sad abt, but then again, i've never succeeded in balancing any cashflow statements on the 1st try before during practices.
ahhhhhhh.
sighs.

wads wrong with the papers this sem.
or rather, wads wrong with the course coordinators this sem.

oh alrights.
enough of lamenting.
i shld go to biz law now.

cold showers at 1am take the fatigue away.
totally refreshing.
i like it.

with that, time to go back to the books. =)

lessons are almost over for the semester.
my 1st yr in uni has almost passed. just like that.
only left with IT seminar(eeks cant wait for it to be over), acc and blaw tuts nxt wk.
nxt thurs is gonna be so exciting cos we'll be getting back the grades of our mid-term test and projs and assignments.
just hope it'll be a good sendoff for us to start on our exam journey.

lectures are done with for yr1.
no more further lectures with the biz students anymore, as they'll go on to specialise in yr2.
so it means that i wont be seeing some frens on a weekly basis anymore.
and no more huishan to walk with me from our hall bus stop to the LTs at 830am.
lec grp is gonna shrink and more more more seminars coming up in the nxt 2 yrs.
sigh oh well whatever.

a fren told me that she's happier this sem.
but its kinda the opposite for me.
alot of things have changed this sem and they arent that easy to juggle with.
and i wonder if there'll be even more changes nxt sem.
and also wonder if they're changes for the better or worse.
"change is the only constant in life."
yesh yesh, we shld all move on.

and yeah, shld worry abt exams first before thinking abt year2.

i feel so manipulated.
not manipulative.
.manipulated.

suddenly, i just feel that the world which i'm in right now isnt that right for me after all.
of cos, i can just choose to see no evil, hear no evil, touch no evil and THINK no evil.
stay in ultimate peace.
ha.

but well, anyway,
when such realisation dawns, i just find it harder and harder to t.r.u.s.t. and b.e.l.i.e.v.e.
thats all.
tsk tsk.